


Space Husbands

by mrflibbleisverycross



Category: Red Dwarf
Genre: Drabble, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-15
Updated: 2015-07-15
Packaged: 2018-04-09 13:06:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4349918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrflibbleisverycross/pseuds/mrflibbleisverycross
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shamelessly stealing that Spirk phrase to title a couple of drabbles I wrote - Rimmer and Lister being their usual charming selves whilst in a relationship. Originally posted on tumblr in 2013.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Space Husbands

“Err Listy, that’s not quite what I wanted to see.”

Lister paused shaving for a moment and swivelled round to face Rimmer who was lying on his bunk directly behind him.

“Something wrong with my arse?” he asked, feigning offence.

Rimmer rolled his eyes. “Lister I could wax lyrical for some time about your posterior and indeed recall having done so on a number of previous occasions. Nonetheless, at this precise moment said hindquarters are obstructing my view of episode 6 of _How to win battles and influence military policy._ ”

Lister digested this speech for a moment.

“Yer what?”

“Arse. Move. Now!”

Lister grinned broadly as he executed a graceful sidestep. “All you had to do was ask.”

“Goit.” Rimmer murmured giving the much discussed portion of his bunkmate’s anatomy an affectionate pinch as he got up to hunt for the remote.

 

* * *

 

 “You’re completely disgusting. You do know that don’t you?” Rimmer wrinkled his nose as he walked into the cockpit.

“Hey! Kryten’s managed to conjure up some whipped cream somehow. It’s the first proper dessert I’ve had in yonks and I am gonna make the most of it.”

He certainly did seem to be making the most mess of it that he could; Rimmer wasn’t entirely sure how much actually had made it into the man’s mouth. Whipped cream dribbled down his chin with occasional splashes escaping all the way onto the controls.

“Careful, you moron, you’ll clog up the steering! We’ll have less manoeuvrability than a remote controlled shopping trolley.”

“It’ll be fine. Comes right off.” He attempted to wipe up some of the mess with a grubby sleeve.

“Now you’re making it worse! Just wait till we’re being chased by some bloodthirsty simulants and we can’t swerve out of the way of a deadly missile because there’s cream messing up the electrics. What a way for the last human in the universe to go, eh? Death by inconveniently placed dairy produce.”

While he spoke, Rimmer’s eyes were fixed on Lister’s mouth. He licked his lips involuntarily. “You’ve got it all over your chin,” he pointed out somewhat unnecessarily.

“You have my heartfelt apologies.” Lister said, eyebrows raised in amusement. His tongue darted out briefly eliciting a slight moan from Rimmer. "Better?“

"Not in the slightest, you slob.” Rimmer growled softly, moving closer. “I really think I’d better do it for you.” He leaned over Lister and kissed him deeply, eradicating all traces of the cream.

There was a slight pause then Lister smirked.

“Fancy licking it off anywhere else?”

“Yes.” Rimmer answered curtly. Without another word, he hauled the still smirking Lister out of his seat and propelled him firmly in the direction of their bunks.


End file.
